I actually have a date today.

Turns out I’m pretty good at this whole online dating thing. I have actually met up with people before but this one seems particularly promising. As in, it’s almost explicitly a date and not just ‘meet a stranger for coffee.’ Which of course means I’m nervous as fuck. Which exacerbates both my neuro stuff and my IBS. Hope they’re ready for a sickly, twitchy weirdo!

Also I gotta go do my nails; I get so obsessive about my appearance when I meet new people.

I recently came to the somewhat unfortunate realization that I’m in chronic pain, walk with a cane, and I’m highly intelligent, overly rational, and a staunch atheist. Also I can be sort of a dick.

At the very least it won’t be a current reference anymore, but if I don’t get called Dr. House for the cane alone at least once, I’ll be fucking shocked.

ryoukisarazu is, to be honest, the over-all best person ever, and that should be a matter of public record.

Also disturbingly proud that my Wikipedia-aided self-diagnosis was spot fucking on,down to the subtype.

Time to stock up on some motherfucking brochures and shit.

Maybe I will make a super informative post about it, later. For now, I’m gonna look for a sweeter cane online ‘cause this Walgreen’s shit ain’t cutting it.

Well, I’ll probably be disabled for the rest of my life, but at least it’ll be a life of normal length.

Haha honestly what the fuck is my life.

Well, I see my neurologist in an hour and a half.

She’s got the result of a test for a very serious disease, and she wants to tell me in person. Which probably means nothing, admittedly. A negative is far more likely, given my history.

Somehow, I’ve actually sort of come to terms with this, whatever happens. I’ve been freaked out about this for over a month, and very soon, it’ll be over and I’ll know. This’ll be the last post I’ll make not knowing, and I kinda feel like Schrodinger’s Cat. The truth is already true, but until I open the box my own truth is in flux. Ignorance isn’t exactly bliss, per se, but it is philosophically fascinating.

See you on the other side of knowing!



please watch this ad for a squirting dildo called Buster McNut

no. you’re lying to me. this isn’t real.

(via yolo-frollo)

Yeah, alright, today is one of those days where I just feel like overthrowing something. Maybe not the entire government, but a couple of institutions would be nice.

I think I might be hypomanic? Just a bit?

I am playing a dangerous game, though, because if I’m actually just really exited that my roomie’s back and this isn’t a biochemical imbalance, then I reeeally should have gone to bed a while ago. If it is, though, I’ll operate just fine (or better) tomorrow even if I only get, like, 4 hours of sleep. But I’m so well medicated and what not that I won’t really be able to tell until I get up tomorrow. Maybe I’ll be peppy, maybe I’ll feel like stale ass. Only time can tell.


Wrong camp asshole, this is The Rudest Colony. Get the fuck out you naked piece of shit.

(via aominekko)

OK let’s play “weird and kinda long gray-A not-at-all-explicit sex talk”:

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The reality of life with glasses is constantly assessing every fabric within grabbing range for potential use in smudge-cleaning.

You know that day when you’ve been feeling run-down and shitty for a while and you wake up coughing and think, “yup, this is it, I am for-real, officially, actually sick?”

This is one of those days for me.
















oh man

(via kexcormacson)

I really do miss my roommate when she goes away.

But on the other hand, I did just eat half a can of mandarin oranges, straight out of the can, with my fingers, while standing shirtless in the middle of my kitchen and musically mumbling a medley of songs from Les Mis. So living alone isn’t all terrible and lonely.